Today I hurt for him

1 Posts | Page(s): 1 

Today I hurt for him

by imyaya on Wed Feb 07, 2018 09:46 AM

Quote | Reply

 I know i am usually writing about my anger, frustration at my husbands disease and what it has done to our relationship, his personality, and how it has wrecked our retirement. Yesterday I was happy as he got up and out of the bed and got into his wheel chair and went outside. As i busied myself around the house i stopped and looked out the window.There he sat at the edge of our yard watching the workers build the house next door to us. It made me so sad and can't get the image out of my mind. I could feel his lonliness,hopelessness and feeling of uselessness. I know he longed for the days (before the big C took his hip and pelvis and the chemo and drugs side effects took away so many things he used to do. And I hurt for him. Usually i am so frustrated with his actions, and the continual monitoring of the crazy things he does but seeing him that way hurt like never before. I went to bed last night and slept for a few hours but woke up at three this  morning thinking about all of it. And hurting from all of it. I see the dreams he has, or had, and the things he feels he will never accomplish. And i see this man that I love with all my heart, but have pulled away while facing all THIS. I just hurt for him, for us, for what might have been. And I hurt for all of you going thru the same thing. Gigi

1 Posts | Page(s): 1 
Subscribe to this message board discussion

Latest Messages

View More

We care about your feedback. Let us know how we can improve your CancerCompass experience.