Vulvar cancer and my wife

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Vulvar cancer and my wife

by vladfan on Fri Feb 11, 2011 04:19 PM

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I am new to this forum but have a lot of emotions about this cancer.

 

My wife was diagnosed in October of 2006 after a biopsy. She shen had surgery where they found out it had gotten into the lymphnodes and they removed the lymphnodes that were cancerous. It was then onto radiation and chemo. She was cancer free for 3 years. In November 2009 it came back and got into the urethra and they removed 90% of her urethra. 2 months later she felt a lump in her groin area. We were told she needed another biopsy. During the biopsy they found her lymphnodes on her left side were a solid mass of cancer. She recovered from that surgery and it was onto mor radiation and chemo.

 

On September 17th we went in for her last chemo appointment when we noticed her neck had alot of swelling. After a ultrasound we were told that the lymphnodes were swollen and if it was cancer there was nothing else they could do for her.

 

On October 9th my wife passed away at home at the very young age of 42. I am dealing with it day by day. I have 2 teenage children that I now need to finish raising by myself.

 

I have been told by the doctors that she is the youngest to die from this(squamous cell carcinoma) vulvar cancer. I am not sure if that is true or not and it doesn't change anything. They are very stunned by the aggressivness that it had.

 

Like I said earlier, I am new here and any input is appreciated.

RE: Vulvar cancer and my wife

by CarmensWife on Fri Feb 11, 2011 04:51 PM

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Hello,

Im so incredibly sorry that you and your family went through such hell. Cancer is disgusting, and I hate what it does to patients and families.

Im from the brain cancer forum. I just happen to notice your sad post. We, as spouses and caretakers understand your heartache and pain and the fear and reality of raising teenagers alone. i wish I had more to offer. I know ill keep you and your young family in my prayers.

Im so sorry for your loss,

Linda--wife of Carmen-- dx CNS Lymphoma/ brain cancer 9/5/2008

 

RE: Vulvar cancer and my wife

by cdimi10 on Sat Feb 18, 2012 12:28 AM

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I am so sorry to here about your loss. i am 31 and just found out i have invasive squamous cell carcinoma of vulva. My consult with oncology is Monday. I was also told i am very young to have this rare cancer. I am very scared i have a loving husband and two young children and worry so much about them and how the will handle this cancer. I will continue to pray for you and your children . may God bless you

RE: Vulvar cancer and my wife

by BeachLady on Sat Feb 18, 2012 02:16 AM

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I just read your post and am so very sorry for your loss.  It must be difficult for you to deal with your pain and be there to comfort and help your teenagers deal with their loss too.

I lost my husband last month to a very agressive form of kidney cancer.  He was diagnosed 6/22/11 and passed away 1/1/12.  We bounced from drug to drug but could never find away to stay ahead of the cancer....Every scan he had indicated the cancer had popped up somewhere else.  It was absolutely horrifying--- Hard for me to believe that a year ago we were normal happy people.

      Take care of yourself and your kids; I know everything probably seems overwhelming right now.  I'm sending you all a hug.     Sue

      

RE: Vulvar cancer and my wife

by catcat4 on Wed Mar 21, 2012 03:02 AM

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This is my first post.  It was August 2000 when I had my first modified radical vulvectomy with lymph resection.  I've had several more surgeries since from recurring vulvar cancer, the last was February 2012.  God has kept me here and going.  I have been truely bless with great doctors and a family that is full of nurses and very supportive. It has been a hard battle and hope each time I have beat it. I am currently working, going to college and will graduate in May 2012.  I don't know if I can help anyone with any questions, but I am willing to try if you have any for me.  I am so sorry to hear about your wife.  You guys are in my prayers.  It is so hard to start over each time emotionally and socially with this cancer.  catcat4

RE: Vulvar cancer and my wife

by ppaseka on Fri Mar 23, 2012 04:36 PM

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First of all, i am very sorry for your loss.  My 43 year old wife was diagnosed with squamous cell carcinoma of the Bartholins Gland on Oct. 12, 2011.  We did not find the cancer until it has metsasized to the lympyh nodes.  The only symptom was a tender spot in her right groin.  The biopsy showed the cancer.  She had a partial vulvectomy to remove the gland, lympyh nodes in both groins and in her illiac region of the aorta.  They removed tumor with close clear margins. Of the 28 nodes removed, 13 had cancer in them.  She recovered well from the surgery.  We did 28 IMRT 6 X radiation treatments and 6 treatments of cisplatin.  We are now doing three more full doses of cisplation once every three weeks.  She is also on Xeloda, 1500 mgs twice daily, two weeks on one week of.  We have one more dose of chemo left.  We met with rad onc on Tuesday.  We have our first scan sometime toward the end of June.  She is very strong.  I am scared to death.  We also have two teenagers, a 11 year old daughter and a 14 year old son.  Our gyn onc at IU Simon Cancer Center told us during our surgery consulatation, that this cancer is very rare being that it started in the Bartholins Gland.  He told us that at the time there probably wasnt 300 cases in the world that was like hers. As far as prognosis, all any of our three doctors will tell us is "it is never good when it mets to lymph nodes.  I would like to talk to you if you are up to it.  If you send me a private reply, i will give you my cell number. 

 

RE: Vulvar cancer and my wife

by Jaanu11 on Mon May 28, 2018 05:09 PM

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I'm so sorry for your loss. I am a daughter and after major heart arrythmia complications and two pacemakers...my mother fought for her health and recovered at 79 only to be diagnosed with this last year. She had a huge tumor invading her rectum, urethra, and lymph nodes of groin. Radiation shrunk it along with chemo but it recurred soon after and a second radiation course was needed. It is not operable as she will not tolerate the surgery and likely won't heal. We have opted to stop now a year and a half later. She is on morphine. I can see the tumor growing and I cry because I don't feel I can help her and we don't have a clear picture of what to expect from here.If anyone has some insight into what happens when the cancer is no longer treated and what causes the death from it (do they just fall asleep and not awaken? Do they get an infection? Does it progress in weeks or months?) I would appreciate it....trying to prepare my father and myself for what is to come. I know I cannot keep my mom forever and I just want to keep her comfortable and pass peacefully when the time comes if that is possible.
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