THIS MASS IN BEING SAID IN MEMORY OF KATHLEEN SAPIENZA

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This Mass In Being Said In Memory Of Kathleen S

by StephenS on Mon Jun 01, 2015 10:03 PM

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Sunday mass at 8:00 a.m. Was given in memory of kathy (a/k/a mom, grandma and daughter) and as soon as it was mentioned, the tears streamed down my face and they would not stop even as i sang the next hymn. I had known about it ever since the past monday cause janet geyer had let me know but it still didn't matter. Prepared or not when the deacon said this mass is in memory of kathleen sapienza i wept like a child. I know some of you read my messages these past several days and wondered why i was feeling such grief again after fourteen months. Well psychologically i guess my mind was preparing to hear her name said at mass. Hearing her name being mentioned just undermined all of my efforts to try and pretend that i had moved on when in fact she is still in my heart, my mind and my every prayer. No matter how much i try to tell myself that her death is no different than the hundreds of thousands of others that occur each year to other individuals' loved ones and that it is part of life it does not ease my sense of loss. I am so blessed and yet i am still so filled with sorrow. My family is and has always been what i believe the sole purpose of life is. The sharing, loving, caring, giving and laughing and crying alone and together we face each day on our trip through life together. Thank you god for all you have done for me and for my family. Please lord comfort me. Let my heart heal. Allow me to be whole again. I do not ask you to let me forget her, because she was my life and my love. I only ask that you allow me to be consoled. I know she is in heaven at your feet and no longer suffers from the disease that racked her body. I know i should celebrate her death as her having moved on to a better place. Please help me to believe this is so. Please help me to realize that the days and years are but a blink of an eye and that i will soon be with her again and that in the meantime i should celebrate each day here on earth with my family and friends. I have tried lord to put on a happy face. I have family gatherings, i have jokes and laughs and we have fun and new memories. Let them burn in my heart and mind and teach me that time moves on and that my journey still has miles to go with more laughs, and smiles, and love, and pain, and joy and memories. Amen

RE: This Mass In Being Said In Memory Of Kathleen S

by Marie55 on Mon Jun 08, 2015 01:51 AM

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Stephen, Beautiful tribute to Kathy. Love hearing about your family. Somehow I feel whether we have a zillion family members surrounding us or few family members, the hole in our heart will always be there. Certain hymns make me cry. Love "Be Not Afraid." Much peace,,,,

RE: This Mass In Being Said In Memory Of Kathleen S

by StephenS on Mon Jun 08, 2015 12:53 PM

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AMEN

RE: This Mass In Being Said In Memory Of Kathleen S

by eternalife on Sat Jun 13, 2015 02:10 AM

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Aw Stephen , you are not alone.. I was at Mass last week myself and heard " and we will raise him up on the last day" and had to fight back the tears... that was a  hymn at my husband's funeral. What about Jahweh I know you are near.. standing always at my side.... and Mark always liked Lift high the cross...

what I know is that our spouses are in a much better place now... no more pain, with all the other family members. We will remember them and can never forget them.

Take care, we have a cross to bear.. just like Jesus did. My priest told me to carry the cross I have been given.. and that's what I remind myself... we have to suffer and this is what we have been given.

Best.... one day at a time.. remain faithful.. be the salt and light to the world... God doesn't make junk.

RE: This Mass In Being Said In Memory Of Kathleen S

by StephenS on Sat Jun 13, 2015 02:49 PM

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As always, your words provide comfort and insight to me. 

RE: This Mass In Being Said In Memory Of Kathleen S

by Wifeofmichael on Wed Jun 24, 2015 05:21 AM

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Eternal rest grant unto her, O Lord, And may perpetual light shine upon her. May her soul and the souls of all the faithful departed, Through the mercy of God, rest in peace. Amen.
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